oh so clearly

by Charlotte Amelia

it’s not like it’s actually the end of the world
it just feels like it a lot of the time
and i was just hoping, really, seeing as the bombs haven’t yet

that you might take a few moments to exist with me and breathe

in the air before it turns to dust

see, i had this idea, a while ago
that we could be possible
see, i’m an optimist under all these layers of self doubt and

deep dark thoughts
and i thought maybe if we touched, just once, it’d all make

sense and you’d see me

because i already saw you, oh so clearly

but truth is, you’re never going to see me, are you?
the bombs could drop and it wouldn’t be me you’d scrabble to

so this is just a note to say i understand
i’ll tamp this down, let it fade
until it barely hurts at all

because every time i rip my skin open for you
you let it fester and you let it bleed
you don’t offer bandages, you don’t even take a second to look
and i think it’s time i realised that, that everything i do and

everything i say

it’s all so much dead air
we’re static on the radio, still figures in the night
and you don’t love me because you don’t even know me
and i know a version of you, but it isn’t one you share with

the world

so yeah, i see you, i saw you, and you blinded me

so with blindfold on and hands outstretched
i back away slowly
i didn’t know blind eyes could still cry
but then, i suppose there’s a lot i don’t know